Enter a New Day…

Three years to the day, this September 12, 2015, I will be in Moncton for an entirely different reason than I was September 12, 2012.

September 12, 2012: I drove home in a silent vehicle with my husband and my son trying to figure out what was going on in our lives. I had been to the birth of a precious little girl whom we thought we would be bringing home a few months prior. When things started to fall apart, I had applied for a part-time contract teaching job figuring if I got it, it would keep my mind occupied and help me cope with everything that was occurring.  God not only provided the job, but it turned into full time work when Ben’s job was cut in hours. I began thinking about pursuing my Masters, and a year later, God opened the doors.

September 12, 2015: I will drive home with my friend and colleague in celebration of what we have accomplished.  I will have completed my final Masters of Education project and presentation.

It is a strange thought.  To think I will be driving home from the same city three years to the day…

These days, I am beginning to realize that in some ways James’s birth mom and I are living parallel lives. For as much as I think about her daughter, I know she must think of James.  Every birthday, every Christmas, every “first” such as the first day of school, there is joy for what is occurring in the life of the one we raise, and yet an ache for the one who isn’t there to share in it.  We may celebrate together at different times around those occasions, but there is something to be said about the very “day.” Yet even with the ache, we know that although we may not fully understand everything, things are meant to be as they are, and we are grateful for what we have been given.  We are blessed by the little life God has given us to raise. Now and again our lives intersect and we watch as our children interact together and marvel at how they resemble each other. Parallel lives…so fascinating.  Still pondering this one.

God will finish what He started, and I believe He’s not finished yet. I don’t know what this means, but I do know He has given me a hope for what is to come, and at the same time, a contentment for what currently is. In the meantime, I will pick up my “pen” and write again.  A new day has come…

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